The First Day of College

Today I took a step back several years to the first day of college. Technically it was my sister’s first day of college, but I felt the same trepidation, awe, and excitement surrounding the whole event.

I’m not going to take a stroll down memory lane, since college is still fresh in my mind, and I don’t want to live in the past.

I do want to bring attention to the presence of shining young faces full of hope and dreams. Especially in the first few weeks of college, everyone is out to make friends. It’s not that I miss that period of time; it’s more that I miss that open attitude of making friends with everyone.

No New Friends

Ok ok, I’ve made some new friends since college. But the number feels really small once you factor out coworkers. What do you have to do to get some genuine human connection around here?

This pain is especially acute when you move to a new city. Everyone else seems to be nestled into their comfortable social networks (usually college) and less inclined to branch out. I know I’m guilty of this too. Old friends are just so reassuring.

Please Help Me New York Times

I always tease one of my friends for reading the New York Times so much. I’m going to go ahead and ignore the irony and reference them here.

As external conditions change, it becomes tougher to meet the three conditions that sociologists since the 1950s have considered crucial to making close friends: proximity; repeated, unplanned interactions; and a setting that encourages people to let their guard down and confide in each other, said Rebecca G. Adams, a professor of sociology and gerontology at the University of North Carolina at Greensboro. This is why so many people meet their lifelong friends in college, she added.

Vulnerability, Proximity, and Unplanned Interactions

Part of the reason I want to blog more is so I can put myself out there and explore the outer limits of what I’m willing to share with everyone. Maybe my writing will move someone.

I also just want to get better at sharing my thoughts and ideas. I’ve been reading a lot of books lately and have really been amazed by how powerful words can be. They transport you into the mind of the author and let you sense everything they sense for a brief moment in time.

Outside of work and my apartment, I don’t really have a place I regularly go to. I’m still looking for that place. Maybe a co-working space? Maybe a meetup? Maybe a class?

But You Already Have Great Friends

I know. But the last thing I want to do is get complacent. I want to push myself and make sure I’m constantly improving as a person. I want to expand my mental models and have diversity of thought.

It ain’t gonna be easy. But I always love a good challenge.